A Ballad for the OG Session At the 22nd ICRC -------------------------------------------- Oh we wrote up our findings, And the Abstract it was vague; For we thought we'd get some hot results Since last in Adelaide. But our simulations wouldn't run; Our computers died for days. In the end we did it all by hand; But at last we had it made. (we thought ...) CHORUS: And it's one sigma; two sigma; Look, it's nearly three! Why would you look in X-rays When you can work in PeV! For it's one sigma; two sigma; Look, it's nearly three! We're off to give our grand result At the Dublin ICRC! We watched our favorite pulsing star; In X-rays it had glowed; And when we did a Rayleigh test, A slight excess it showed. We found a peak at 0.8, but significance was low; Until we found a litle flare; and significance began to grow. CHORUS: Look - It's one sigma; two sigma; Yes! It's nearly three! We'd trade 10^16 X-rays For just one PeV! (Assuming a power-law photon distribution of E^-2.4) Yes, it's one sigma; two sigma; Hurrah! It's nearly three! We now have our grand result For the Dublin ICRC! But woe! The data were muon-rich That we'd thought were muon-free; Someone had switched all our tapes Accidentally. Our flare, it was not gammas. With grieving hearts indeed We prepared to withdraw our Abstract From the Dublin ICRC. CHORUS: It was one, sigma; two sigma; It nearly had been three. Whipple has it easy Compared to PeV. It was one sigma; two sigma; It really wasn't three. So we withdrew our abstract From the Dublin ICRC. But wait - some clever theorists Have made a new theory. They postulate a class of hadrons Called "nuetralalunis" That come from special X-ray stars Like our pulsing binary, And close the Universe; erase National Debts; And pulse in PeVs. Chorus: Whee! It's one sigma; two sigma; Hurrah! We're back to three! ROSAT, GINGA, GRANAT, and GRO Can't compare to UHE! Yes, it's one sigma; two sigma; It's very nearly three! We're writing up our grand result To give at Calgary! REPRISE: And it's one sigma; two sigma; Look, it's nearly three! Why would you work in X-rays When you can work in PeV? Yes, it's one sigma; two sigma; Look, it's nearly three! We've written up our grand result And we're off to Calgary!